Fake tradies are appearing in the wake of Townsville floods. Key signs include lack of bum crack and punctuality.

“Hold on. You said you’d be here at 8am and it’s 8.01am. Somethings off!”

Given the widespread damage caused by the Townsville floods, it’s no wonder there are a high number of residents looking for repairs and renovations. Unfortunately for Townsvillians, a number of fake tradies are making the rounds and ripping people off left and right.

Doug Murray, 28, of Oonoonba, is one such local. “This bloke came round to fix up me back patio and did a shit job. I should have known something was sus when he grouted the tiles with Blu Tak,” said the father of three. “Looking back, I cant believe I missed the signs.”

Doug went on to share his experience on a community website in the hopes of stopping ordinary, decent folks from falling for this type of scam.

“The first and most obvious one is punctuality. If they give you a specific time, rather than saying between 8-1pm – and telling you they’ll call when they’re on their way and they don’t – look out.”

“The second is bum crack. If it’s been longer than 10 minutes and you haven’t seen crack – send them back,” said an angry Doug.

“And lastly, be to sure to ask them what they’re doing in late November/early December. If they don’t say going down the Goldie to pick up some Schoolies, you know something’s off.”

The bureau of Community Affairs encourages everyone to double check their tradies references before employing them. Some questions to ask locals include: how many times did they not return your call, how many cups of coffee did they try and get out of you, and how much did they overcharge you by.

Published by Brian Rowe

Brian lives in Queensland with his wife and [insert Councilly approved number of] cats and dogs. Has been described as handsome, charming, intelligent... and his mum also said, “He’s a very good boy.”

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