Two nine-year-old girls have gone on a rampage, spitting on security guards and hurling abuse at a pregnant woman at a busy Gold Coast shopping centre after learning that the Coles Stikeez promotion had ended.
Talent agents and producers are fighting it out to sign the two nine-year-old girls.
“These girls are far advanced in all the areas we look for when signing talent to lucrative TV deals,” said well respected TV producer, Phil Wadestein.
“These girls have it all. They’re loud. They’re abusive. They’re self confident, for no apparent reason, and they really don’t give two fucks about what people think of them.”
“Also, they know how to attract their own media attention meaning I don’t have to lift a finger.”
The video shows the two girls jumping on the roof and windscreen of a car at Westfield Helensvale, moments after punching a security guard and threatening to attack shoppers.
“This is our car so get fucked!” one of the girls screamed.
“Well, maybe it is her car,” said Mr Wadestein. “We shouldn’t just assume it isn’t.”
The two girls were apparently very angry to hear that the Coles Stikeez promotion had ended.
“They absolutely lost their shit! This is exactly the type of reaction we look for in development deals. I fully expect to see these girls on our TVs in 10 years time. They could be future MAFS stars. Or we could even put them on the Block. They would be perfect for the scenes where contestants spit the dummy, walk off set, and then return to collect their half a million dollars.”
“The only problem is the contracts need to be signed by the kids parents. And not surprisingly, we are having trouble locating them.”