With the pop-up of self-serve machines at McDonalds around he country, a canny McDonalds veteran manager – Trish McAfee, 23 – has discovered a fundamental flaw with their implementation. By depriving teenage workers of legitimate interactions with other humans, they will never learn just how rude customers can be.
“This is a huge problem for the service industry,” said old hand Trish, who’s been serving customers since she was 14. “One of the first lessons you learn is just how many arseholes there are in the world, and by putting these machines in we deprive kids of this vital life lesson.”
Having a customer order one thing then tell you they ordered something different, complaining that they only got three sauce packets and not four, or screaming at you because they had to wait two while minutes for their meal, are valuable life lessons that the young will miss out on.
“I’ll admit that part of my motivation is jealousy. If I had to be yelled at, so should they. But it’s not right that young people go into customer service and be given a false impression that customers are all nice. Some are, sure, but there are a tonne of arseholes too.”
Open to compromise, Trish has put forward a workable solution. “Keep installing your machines, fine. But every time a customer can’t get one working and becomes irate, we send the newbie over to take their order. They’ll quickly learn how rude people can be.”