At an international anthropological conference on cultural norms this week, the entire audience was spellbound when the Australian delegation got up to speak. Often horribly mislabeled as a country having no culture, the Australian Ambassador – Beau Gan – regaled the conference with many a complex and intricate details of transitioning from youth into adulthood Down Under.
“You might have a simple ritual of going on to a party in Mexico, but in Oz, transitioning from a teenager into an adult involves many complex processes”, said Beau. “For starters, you have to participate in what’s known as ‘Goon of Fortune,’” he said as delegates furiously took notes. “You take backyard clothesline and get everyone to stand around it. Someone pegs a bag of goon – ah, the skin which holds wine inside a box – and you spin it. Whomever it stops at, they have to drink”, he said to a highly intrigued audience.
“From there, you pile seven people into a five-seater sedan and do a “Maino” – which is when you drive up the main street on a Saturday night. “What do they see on this trip?” asked the Mexican delegate curiously. “Nothing. It’s about being seen, Pedro.”
“From there, you have to park in Macca’s – that’s McDonalds – carpark and hang out for a good few hours, standing around doing nothing. This is a mark of high status that you will be able to talk about at school for years. Then, after you and the six others have spent a combined amount of about two dollars at Macca’s, you head home.”
Fascinated, the delegates had no idea there were so many intricate levels to the Aussie experience and all accepted Beau’s invitation to come over and sample some of Australia’s most famous delicacies including his wife’s pavlova, his mum’s curried eggs, and his Nana’s cob loaf.