Government going right ahead with nationwide online NAPLAN test after trials this year were a spectacular failure.

“Just because it didn’t work this year doesn’t mean it won’t work next year,” said Education spokesperson, Dustin Chalk (51).

Results from the online 2019 NAPLAN trial are in and the verdict was it was a mess, with many schools not being able to log in or have enough computers for all students to use. Anyone who has ever set foot in a school knows this will happen and never work, so naturally the government is planning on ploughing right ahead despite all evidence to the contrary.

“Just because it didn’t work this year doesn’t mean it won’t work next year,” said Education spokesperson, Dustin Chalk (51). “I mean, it won’t work. It didn’t work, which should be an indicator to us here at the Department to stop this before it’s too late, but logic has never been our strong suit.”

One could be forgiven for thinking the online switch is an effective way to kill NAPLAN, as it will resemble a 3,000 car pile up on a single lane highway – the only thing is the government is just not that smart and is clearly oblivious to the problems going online will cause.

“Look, there’s no evidence to suggest there will be problems. Remember the online census? Oh wait, that was a failure. How about the 2019 trial of NAPLAN online? Oh wait, that was a failure too. So see, no evidence whatsoever,” said Dustin.

At this time, the only thing we can look forward to is the massive clusterfuck that is coming in 2020 and the inevitable denials and blame-shifting from these so-called education experts. Good job people.

Published by Brian Rowe

Brian lives in Queensland with his wife and [insert Councilly approved number of] cats and dogs. Has been described as handsome, charming, intelligent... and his mum also said, “He’s a very good boy.”

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