Education

University student who professes to believe in communism complains about group assignment.

“But I did most of the work,” moaned Igor Gunnastarveabitch (22).

After a committed six months as a member of the Australian Communist Party, hardcore socialist Igor Gunnastarveabitch was given a group assignment in his second year civics course – a course he is retaking because of failing due to a ‘bourgeois scum’ lecturer.

Accepting the assignment, and a new group of acquaintances for the project, everything went smoothly until it came time to do the work. After Igor did all of the research and writing, he was in for a shock when his colleagues did nothing and received the same B+ that he did.

“It’s not fair! They shouldn’t get anything. I mean, sure they’re my worker brothers and sisters and all that, but I did most of the work,” moaned Igor Gunnastarveabitch (22). “If I earn it, I should get to keep it,” said a very ‘Adam Smith’ sounding Igor.

Igor has since written to the faculty head demanding the paper be remarked so that he can be awarded all the credit. Completely oblivious to the fact this goes against his so-called beliefs, Igor also missed the point that this was a real world example of how communism doesn’t actually work. After pointing this out to Igor, he took a moment before repeating the leftist mantra – “But that wasn’t real communism.”

Word is the faculty head is refusing to change the mark and suggests Igor try reading a book – any book – on how humans really behave. Selfishly.

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