Local man Ronald Orchid has already let himself down for a third year in a row, as he has yet again failed his attempt at a dry July.
“I swear to God I thought it was the last day of June today!” slurred Ron.
“I thought I’d enjoy a beer or two or three for lunch, as I thought this was my last bevvy for a whole month.”
Dry July is a not-for-profit organisation that challenges people to abstain from drinking alcohol for the month of July to support adults who have cancer.
For yet another year young Ronaldo has raised a grand total of $0.
“Since I’ve already stuffed up July for another year I might as well get stuck right in,” said Ron, as he downed his fifth for the day.
“Oh well, I’ll be back next year to give it another swig.”
Over 36,000 Aussies are taking part in Dry July this year. Fingers crossed they last a few days longer than young Ronald.