Netflix and Foxtel combining to ensure you never leave your couch.

Rumours are circulating that Foxtel and Netflix are merging and it has the hearts of avid couch potato’s racing. Earlier this week a keen-eyed lounge lizard noticed a never before seen button on the new Foxtel remote – one that said the magical word ‘Netflix.’

Given that Foxtel have been haemorrhaging viewers since Game of Thrones finished, it makes financial sense that Foxtel would add them into the fold. The unforeseen issue, however, is just how large the population are going to get now that there’s twice the TV and movies to watch.

“I already watch too much TV, so now with NetFox or FoxNet or whatever they’re going to call it I’ll never leave the house. If they merge with Ben and Jerry’s we’re screwed,” said avid TV watcher, Carol Couchsitter (31).

Pretty soon Australia will be heading into the same television territory as America with hundreds of channels to choose from. And once we do, like America, we’ll also need larger seats on airlines because we will become a nation of fatties who never leave the couch. Foxtel might as well just go ahead and call the new endeavour Fatflix, because that’s where we are headed.

Published by Brian Rowe

Brian lives in Queensland with his wife and [insert Councilly approved number of] cats and dogs. Has been described as handsome, charming, intelligent... and his mum also said, “He’s a very good boy.”

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