Man shocked when not one of his 756 Facebook friends help him move or even loan him a ute.

Dom Dumbass (25) is proud of the amount of friends he has on Facebook, something he talks about quite often.

“Yep. Got 756 friends, that’s way more than most people,” bragged Dom.

But Dom’s world came crashing down on the weekend when he put the call out for his friends to help him move and not one of them turned up.

“I couldn’t believe it,” said Dom. “I was expecting at least 400 of them to turn up and help me out. I figured the whole move would take three minutes with the number of mates I have,” a bewildered Dom said.

Left to complete the entire move on his own, it was having to organize a truck at the last minute that upset him the most.

“I’ve got 37 mates on Facebook who own utes, and not one would loan me one. Two of them even have utes as their profile picture and one calls himself the ‘Ute master.’ It’s bullshit!”

After an exhausting 10 hours of moving by himself, Dom said he is ready to forgive his friends for their no-show on the weekend, posting the following message on Facebook.

‘It’s all good people. I forgive you all for not turning up and understand you must have had something else on – all 756 of you. We’re still friends and I know in my heart that if I ever need money, you’ll be there to loan it to me.’

At present, not one of Dom’s 756 friends has liked his post.

Published by Brian Rowe

Brian lives in Queensland with his wife and [insert Councilly approved number of] cats and dogs. He has been described as handsome, charming, intelligent... and his mum also said, “He’s a very good boy.”

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